You know, I know that I should be kind and agree that people get tongue-tied and inarticulate, but part of the problem really is that people can be quite shockingly stupid and insensitive. I could come up with about a million different examples of this kind of thing -- the person who kept insisting that my sister who can't have children should stop being selfish and have a baby; the cousin who told another sister to stop crying at our grandmother's wake because it was inappropriate, etc. Sadly, this is true on the best days of our lives, and it doesn't get any better on the worst.

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