more transportation fun

[phosfate]

Went for groceries on Friday night. For once it didn't take an hour to get a cab, and the phone app actually worked. Unfortunately, I got Casey, the guy you may remember from a few weeks back who was a glassy-eyed Bernie Bro and scared the shit out of me. He is no longer a cultist, or ZTrip had a talk with him about oversharing, but he is still a bad driver and won't shut the fuck up and pay attention to the road.

I am happy to report that my mask* disturbed the shit out of him.

I am unhappy to report that while he did volunteer to help me put my bags on the back porch, I came around the corner toting two six-packs of soda and a gallon of milk to find that he had removed my tablet case from my bag, had opened it, and...I have no idea what his next intention was.

I'm not sure what to do about this. He seemed to have no understanding at all that this was wrong. I was reluctant to confront a loopy man who knows where I live and that I live alone, for reasons that should be obvious. And, in all honesty, I was simply too gobsmacked to yell at him. I gave him a stinkin' review on the app. If I get him again (and the app is functioning as it is supposed to, which it rarely is), I will turn him down and ask for another driver.

Mostly I am posting this here as a record of what happened.




*https://www.redbubble.com/i/mask/Gavotte-by-andycwhite/47728462.9G0D8 and it's even scarier in person.

Comments

[dr_tectonic]

What. The fuck?

Also, your mask is terrifying.

[cimorene]

Christ. That's a real Psycho shower scene music moment.

[cimorene]

But I giggled a lot at the mask.

[nita]

I am amused and disturbed by your mask. But I'm even happier it disturbed that driver.

If I were you, I'd report this guy's behavior with the tablet to the cab company. Whatever he was planning to do was wrong.

[kirbyfest]

That mask is terrifying, but not as scary as rando cab guy GOING IN YOUR BAG.

[phosfate]

I don't know, man, it's like the Rona has driven white boys completely insane.

[phosfate]

Redbubble's mask production has totally bottlenecked as consumers have learned about them and more artists add them, but there is some astonishing shit. One fella in Italy specializes in cult movies and has an honest to God Phase IV mask with Saul Bass art of a giant ant dominating the globe. Another has the scary interstitial screens from Threads (Fuel stocks: Diminishing. Transport: Difficult. Food supplies: Unreliable.). There is also SPACEBALLS THE FACE MASK, and ARTHUR SHAPPEY THINKS I'M BRILLIANT AND THAT'S GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME.

[phosfate]

If we were on Facebook I'd find his mom and have her talk to him.

[phosfate]

I gave him a stinkin' review and that's basically all I can do for the moment. The company headquarters and phone lines are in fucking Arizona or something and have only recently figured out that we are not Omaha.

[phosfate]

It was. It was like walking in on a Visitor deep-throating a live hamster.

[cimorene]

LOL. It's really great that they were there and positioned to use their machinery to do these custom masks, isn't it?

[cimorene]

Well, now I'll probably dream about that.

[crantz]

I do not like this man.

[phosfate]

All the custom shirt 'n shit places adopted them at once, so I assume the machines came on the international market when somebody saw a need. Digitally printed masks shipping from China have been on offer on Amazon since at least March, but have largely disappeared due to selling out very quickly and failing to ship. Mine have yet to arrive.

The three I ordered on Memorial Day (they had a sale) are finally "in production."

[phosfate]

No. The first time I figured he was just sucked into a cult and parroting what he read online (a lot of his facts were total bullshit, but his wrong is not my job). Now it's obvious he's a genuine tool and also doesn't drive well.