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say hello to my little friend
Mar. 22nd, 2011 10:07 am
That's the cunt that did it!
Actually I stole the pic from somebody's Blogspot. Mine has a black metal basket and a Power Rangers bell.
That's the cunt that did it!
Actually I stole the pic from somebody's Blogspot. Mine has a black metal basket and a Power Rangers bell.
(no subject)
Mar. 21st, 2011 10:45 amLong story short: I didn't get to see Paul because a bicycle fell on my head while I was looking for my wallet. Schwinn Breeze. Vintage. It's tasted blood now.
It worked perfectly on the way home tonight.
It is just fucking with me.
It is just fucking with me.
(no subject)
Oct. 23rd, 2009 11:02 amNot Bennet, Walton. I always get that wrong.
Drove the car out to Bill. It went like a kitten for the first mile or so, but then steamed up again at 33rd Street. Bill suspects hoses. Bill's assistant, whose name I can never remember even though he's the nicest man on the planet, drove me back in his giant truck.
I told him about the thing with the timing belt and Matt. We did our little Midwestern dance of extreme politeness, since we are not a trash-talking people, but we eventually agreed that Matt is a goddamn tool.
I am just glad that the engine is making steam, and not fire. It may have been doing this for a couple of days -- the ran has been so hard and so nonstop that any vapor was invisible against the rain froth.
I do hope I have money for this.
Drove the car out to Bill. It went like a kitten for the first mile or so, but then steamed up again at 33rd Street. Bill suspects hoses. Bill's assistant, whose name I can never remember even though he's the nicest man on the planet, drove me back in his giant truck.
I told him about the thing with the timing belt and Matt. We did our little Midwestern dance of extreme politeness, since we are not a trash-talking people, but we eventually agreed that Matt is a goddamn tool.
I am just glad that the engine is making steam, and not fire. It may have been doing this for a couple of days -- the ran has been so hard and so nonstop that any vapor was invisible against the rain froth.
I do hope I have money for this.
(no subject)
Oct. 23rd, 2009 08:38 amCar hood started spewing vapor when I pulled into the garage at work. So I called Bill (NOT Matt, fuck you, Matt) from the office, and have to take it out to Bennet before 11:00 so someone is there to give me a ride back.
It has been raining for three days straight, in the same direction, and the basement window is, understandably I think, leaking.
Fuck.
It has been raining for three days straight, in the same direction, and the basement window is, understandably I think, leaking.
Fuck.
(no subject)
May. 14th, 2009 03:34 pm"We just need one liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitle hose, but it'll be done tomorrow."
He had the grace to sound contrite this time.
This has become downright Becketty.
He had the grace to sound contrite this time.
This has become downright Becketty.
(no subject)
May. 13th, 2009 04:55 pmIt must be me! It must be my fault! Me, with my shrewish way of calling him every two or three days and asking how my car is in that nagging tone! Oh, curse my harpy-like temperament! Why can I not be kind and logical and patient???
(no subject)
May. 13th, 2009 12:34 pmGood God. I went out at lunch and bought a Self-Pity Special (latte w/a shot of syrup). I haven't done that in 10 years.
If I die, I want y'all to fight out in the backyard for my stuff.
If I die, I want y'all to fight out in the backyard for my stuff.
AND I SAID, 'SHRINK, I WANT TO KILL!'
May. 12th, 2009 06:24 pm"We're just finishing it up."
"So...?"
"Give us a call tomorrow afternoon, see if it's done."
I fucking hate you, Matt.
"So...?"
"Give us a call tomorrow afternoon, see if it's done."
I fucking hate you, Matt.
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(no subject)
May. 9th, 2009 07:56 pmWalked to bookstore, got some new stuff. Went from there to Target (the Haunted Serial Killer Woods have been cut down, so there's a shortcut now), got ten tons of groceries, took it home in a cab.
The taxi driver, Ms DeNiro, was reading an ancient, coverless Zenna Henderson (not while driving). We both agree that nothing is funnier than a McDonald's on a Thursday morning, when 800 old people meet for coffee.
Speaking of driving while reading, when you're on a bus you can look down directly into people's cars. Saw a woman driving with an open novel in her lap the other day. Sadly, the jacket was the wrong color for Twilight, which would have made it stupidly perfect.
Also, little kids in the backs of cars will look up at you and wave. :D
Plants vs. Zombies continues to be awesome. One of the mini-games is Slot Machine. I've found you can use it for the equivalent of leveling, and am raising $20,000 for an extra plant slot. There are levels where half the yard is covered in fog, and it's genuinely scary -- at least as much as a game with Michael Jackson and back-up dancer zombies can be.
The taxi driver, Ms DeNiro, was reading an ancient, coverless Zenna Henderson (not while driving). We both agree that nothing is funnier than a McDonald's on a Thursday morning, when 800 old people meet for coffee.
Speaking of driving while reading, when you're on a bus you can look down directly into people's cars. Saw a woman driving with an open novel in her lap the other day. Sadly, the jacket was the wrong color for Twilight, which would have made it stupidly perfect.
Also, little kids in the backs of cars will look up at you and wave. :D
Plants vs. Zombies continues to be awesome. One of the mini-games is Slot Machine. I've found you can use it for the equivalent of leveling, and am raising $20,000 for an extra plant slot. There are levels where half the yard is covered in fog, and it's genuinely scary -- at least as much as a game with Michael Jackson and back-up dancer zombies can be.
well HI MATT!
May. 8th, 2009 11:22 amCalled again. Apparently they've been waiting for parts, which just arrived this morning. Why he could not have said so before, I don't know.
"I'm running out of food, Matt."
"I'll give you a call. We should have it in the next day or so."
*plots murder*
"I'm running out of food, Matt."
"I'll give you a call. We should have it in the next day or so."
*plots murder*
(no subject)
May. 8th, 2009 10:48 amStill no car. Becoming quite angry.
Had to cancel dental appointment, and am running out of food.
Had to cancel dental appointment, and am running out of food.
(no subject)
May. 6th, 2009 09:05 amMan across the aisle from me on the bus last night had a gallon jug of 2% milk. He drank half of it.
This morning's ride featured an old blind guy who was apparently suffering from dementia or hallucinations. He turned to the empty space next to him, and said: "What's with the goddamn coughing? Jesus!" Indeed, sir.
Really, only a tiny portion of the riders are visibly insane, but they do stand out in the memory. Guy last week told me a story about how the snipers in the trees in Woods Park would take him out if they got the chance. "Just like my ex-wives. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
I guess you had to be there.
This morning's ride featured an old blind guy who was apparently suffering from dementia or hallucinations. He turned to the empty space next to him, and said: "What's with the goddamn coughing? Jesus!" Indeed, sir.
Really, only a tiny portion of the riders are visibly insane, but they do stand out in the memory. Guy last week told me a story about how the snipers in the trees in Woods Park would take him out if they got the chance. "Just like my ex-wives. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
I guess you had to be there.
I fucking hate you, Matt.
May. 5th, 2009 03:19 pm"Hi, Matt, it's Ann Larimer. How's my little Chevy doing?"
"Oh, y'know, we're working on it. We should have it finished in the next day or so."
*facetwitch* "Okay, well, let me know if anything changes, okay?"
"Yeah sure."
*twitch*
*twitchtwitch*
*twitch*
"Oh, y'know, we're working on it. We should have it finished in the next day or so."
*facetwitch* "Okay, well, let me know if anything changes, okay?"
"Yeah sure."
*twitch*
*twitchtwitch*
*twitch*
i'm gonna call Matt after 3:00
May. 5th, 2009 02:55 pmYou have approximately 10 minutes to complete your wagering.
ETA: WAGERING IS NOW CLOSED.
ETA: WAGERING IS NOW CLOSED.
(no subject)
May. 4th, 2009 10:21 amSevere meltdown Saturday. Which was okay -- at least in the end I finally got some sleep.
After a week of being completely unable to find coffee filters, I used my last one Sunday morning. I walked over to Target, because they always have coffee filters. Except they totally didn't. I am starting to wonder if there was a fire at the coffee filter plant or something. Went next door to the big box grocery, and found a package of 500 for 29 cents, or whatever it goes for. Should last me through the week.
The person next to me was buying a couple hundred bottles of Gatorade. Did you know it comes in blue? I sure didn't. Is the flavor Slushee blue, or antifreeze blue?
The sticker machine had Wonder Pets tattoos. Got hamster and duck. Sadly, did not get the turtle. I like the turtle. He has the crazy eyes.
Figured out that constant exhaustion comes from the twice-daily total muscle lock necessary to keep from falling onto the floor of the bus. The seat is a couple inches too high for my legs to reach the floor, and those guys drive like motherfuckers. They have the crazy eyes, like the turtle. Happily, it annoys them if you say, "Big money big money no whammy!" while feeding money into the moneyvac, or "Yahtzee!" if it accepts your dollar first try without horking it up again.
Fix my car, Matt. Matt. Matt. MATT FIX MY CAR.
After a week of being completely unable to find coffee filters, I used my last one Sunday morning. I walked over to Target, because they always have coffee filters. Except they totally didn't. I am starting to wonder if there was a fire at the coffee filter plant or something. Went next door to the big box grocery, and found a package of 500 for 29 cents, or whatever it goes for. Should last me through the week.
The person next to me was buying a couple hundred bottles of Gatorade. Did you know it comes in blue? I sure didn't. Is the flavor Slushee blue, or antifreeze blue?
The sticker machine had Wonder Pets tattoos. Got hamster and duck. Sadly, did not get the turtle. I like the turtle. He has the crazy eyes.
Figured out that constant exhaustion comes from the twice-daily total muscle lock necessary to keep from falling onto the floor of the bus. The seat is a couple inches too high for my legs to reach the floor, and those guys drive like motherfuckers. They have the crazy eyes, like the turtle. Happily, it annoys them if you say, "Big money big money no whammy!" while feeding money into the moneyvac, or "Yahtzee!" if it accepts your dollar first try without horking it up again.
Fix my car, Matt. Matt. Matt. MATT FIX MY CAR.
(no subject)
Apr. 30th, 2009 09:22 pmOnce again, the bus. One stops right in front of my building, which is handy for going home. Our new place is in a rather stabby, drinky, untreated schizophrenicky bit of town, but being the Midwest, this is relative -- you're safer than you would be in front of Rockefeller Center, and your greatest risk is from cyclists using the sidewalk.
Even so, it's a bit unsettling when one of the local homeless guys comes up to me, and says:
"You need any money?"
"I...I'm sorry, what?"
"I have some money. Do you need anything to tide you over?"
"No, I'm good, thank you."
"You sure? You don't need a couple of bucks?"
"Yes. You keep it. Thank you, though."
"Okay." And he wanders off.
Maybe it's because I wasn't wearing a coat.
Anyway, this was infinitely preferable to what happened at the other end of the line, when I got off the bus, and a young gentleman riding shotgun in what was apparently his big brother's car was compelled to inform me:
"MASSIVE BONER!"
as he drove past.
I can only assume I'm totally rocking that hottie hobo look.
I went home and ordered pizza, because I don't want to go out there anymore.
Matt? Honey? FIX MY GODDAMN CAR!
Even so, it's a bit unsettling when one of the local homeless guys comes up to me, and says:
"You need any money?"
"I...I'm sorry, what?"
"I have some money. Do you need anything to tide you over?"
"No, I'm good, thank you."
"You sure? You don't need a couple of bucks?"
"Yes. You keep it. Thank you, though."
"Okay." And he wanders off.
Maybe it's because I wasn't wearing a coat.
Anyway, this was infinitely preferable to what happened at the other end of the line, when I got off the bus, and a young gentleman riding shotgun in what was apparently his big brother's car was compelled to inform me:
"MASSIVE BONER!"
as he drove past.
I can only assume I'm totally rocking that hottie hobo look.
I went home and ordered pizza, because I don't want to go out there anymore.
Matt? Honey? FIX MY GODDAMN CAR!
