kid virus ann

[phosfate]

So, like, I woke up this morning and it's the wrong bears, where's Tim??? WHERE'S TIM??? And Pudy? And My room is all wrong and the toys are just gross! And there's a big heavy shovel and and and MOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!

* * *


O_o

O_o!!!!!!!!!

This. TV. Has. 70. Channels. Oh. My. God. It's. In. Color. That. Guy. Just. Said. "Ass."

I don't think I should be watching this.

But nobody's stopping me so far.

I need a bowl of Quisp to go with the TV.

Comments

[charlotteismad.livejournal.com]

Haha! Brilliant! Is Buffy on?

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

::frowns::

You mean like Buffy and Jody and Mr French? Oooo, maybe it's the one where they get lost in Spain! That's scary!

This Can't Be Good

[faramirofgondor.livejournal.com]

sneaks into Ann's room, grabs shovel, sneaks back out

I'll give it back to her when she's older. It's for her own good.

Re: This Can't Be Good

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

THERE'S A MAN IN THE HOUSE!!!!!!!!

No! ::beats you with softball bat:: No no no no no no no HELP no no no no no no no POLICE no no no no no no no no POLICE no no no no no no no no HELP no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no!!!!!

Ow! Ow! Ow!

[faramirofgondor.livejournal.com]

Stupid rugrat! Stop it NOW or I'll make you watch the Pax Channel! Ow!

I'm not a bad man. I'm your friend. If you want to, you can come over to Bibi's room. I'm telling stories in there and she has cats you can play with.

Oh, man. Is this supposed to be some sort of fatherhood training ritual, all aimed at me? Nah, that's too paranoid, even for a son of Gondor.

Re: Ow! Ow! Ow!

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

::pause::

MOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!! DONNIE! BILLY! KIMMIE! PEEEEEEEEEEEEEETE!!!!!!

::picks up the phone::

::dials 'O'::

Operator?

::hits you with receiver::

Send the police!

::hits you with receiver::

Send the police!

::hits you with receiver::

Send the police!

::hits you with receiver::

Send the police!

::hits you with receiver::

Send the police!

::hits you with receiver::

Send the police!

::hits you with receiver::

MOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!

Okay, THAT IS ENOUGH!

[faramirofgondor.livejournal.com]

Ties you to chair, props it in front of television. Turns on a "Touched By An Angel" rerun.

Collapses, in pain.

Re: Okay, THAT IS ENOUGH!

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

You're bad and scary and the police are coming!!!! They'll put you in jail! Mom'll be really really mad at you and she's the strongest Mom in the world she's a million times stronger than your mom and the police are coming now and you're horrible and I hate you and get out get out this isn't your house get out get out get out!!!

::sirens in the distance::

Re: Okay, THAT IS ENOUGH!

[faramirofgondor.livejournal.com]

Oh, crap.

Dives out of window, disappears down the street.

Re: Okay, THAT IS ENOUGH!

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

He was mean.

My brother is a police man! He'll get you!!!

::watches TV::

This show is scary.

[jadegemini.livejournal.com]

Please don't beat my Papa! I love my Papa!

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

He got away. Why was he in my house???

[jadegemini.livejournal.com]

I don't know. Maybe he was looking for me.

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

He took the shovel!!!

[jadegemini.livejournal.com]

Oh, wow. You had a shovel? Cool! You could whack people with it and everything! But he took it away, huh? Maybe he didn't want you to whack people with your shovel.

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

I don't know. The shovel was there when he woke up. I whacked him with my wood softball bat, like I always do.

You want to watch TV and color and stuff?

[jadegemini.livejournal.com]

Well I would, but me and Eomer and Merin are on the roof with water balloons. We're going to try to hit Uncle Boro, if we can find water. Wanna help?

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

No. I gotta stay here in case the bad man comes back and hit him and get the shovel back cause it's probably Mom's and she'll get mad. Also there's TV.

[jadegemini.livejournal.com]

Ok. Have fun.

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

You too!

[amanda-now.livejournal.com]

I feel like I'm listening to my four year old sister....

I feel like I should hand out Rice Crispy treats or something...

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

You could untie me...

Re:

[amanda-now.livejournal.com]

Okay ::does so::

But don't hit me with a bat. Here's some Crayola jumbo crayons in assorted colors. Have fun.

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

Okay! Thanks, Mrs. lady!

Re:

[amanda-now.livejournal.com]

So if you are a kid did time itself reverse or does this affect only you?

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

I heard one of those stupid Baggins kids did something stupid, because they're so stupid. He's gonna get in trouble! Stupid.

Re:

[amanda-now.livejournal.com]

I can't decide if little baby hobits are cute or scary...

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

They're stupid. Stupid baby Hobbits.

[glorfind3l.livejournal.com]

ahahahahahahaha

What's Quisp?

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

::hands on hips::

Okay, for the stupid people who never watch TV, Quisp is the spaceman from the ceral box. His enemy is Quake, the construction worker, who also has cereal but we don't eat it in this house 'cause it's nasty and Quake is mean.

[glorfind3l.livejournal.com]

Right, right. My apologies, Elrond only installed cable in Rivendell a month or so ago and my mun is an infant. We're all terribly behind. Also, the only cereal they have around here is whole grain fruity elvish shit. My husband has to import his Cap'n Crunch from Gondor.

[riverdaughter.livejournal.com]

wow where did you get that bat? i should get one for me because maybe it would make mr. bombadil stop giving me tea!

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

...Captain Crunch is okay...

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

's for playin' ball. My Dad got it for me at Gold's.