i made this!

My mother has finally discovered her very own Toys R Us, and it's called Menards. Yes, MSTies, as in "It's a Giant Spider Invasion at Menards!!!" They stock all her favorite stuff in the world, apart from tailored suits and coffee - tile, shovels, paint, tile, those hooky things that go on the garage wall, tile, and of course tile. Combine her new obsession with the fact that, out of all those who contributed to or share my genetic make-up, I am the only one who is capable of reading assembly instructions,* and somehow it seems almost reasonable that today, a lovely, mild Saturday when normal people go to the mall, I built a glider swing.
(*Except my brother Donnie, but you really don't want him putting your stuff together unless you want to take the chance that it'll look very different - if more efficient and functional - than its original design. Never give him a watch as a gift. Trust me.)

It only took five hours, thanks to the help of the guy up the block who owns, y'know, ratchets 'n junk.

It's the weekend of the local air show, and the Japanese Zeroes which flew overhead in formation at periodic intervals, combined with the ratchet guy's two enormous half-grown German Shepherds' (Zeus and Mariah) insistence on tongueing my ear, added a surreal note to the afternoon.

The completed swing is purrrrrrrty.