call me ms. cut-and-paste

[phosfate]

If you read this, if your eyes are passing over this right now, (even if we don't speak often) please post a comment with a COMPLETELY MADE UP AND FICTIONAL memory of you and me.

It can be anything you want - good or bad - BUT IT HAS TO BE FAKE.

When you're finished, post this little paragraph on your LJ and be surprised (or mortified) about what people DON'T ACTUALLY remember about you.

[I'm declaring repost amnesty, because that's just too damn chainlettery. Repost if you want. Don't. Free will is a good thing.]

Comments

[tikistitch.livejournal.com]

OMG remember those rilly cute uniforms you and I used to wear when we were fighting Evil as Snark Lady and tikigirl? And how you got all pissy over your boyfriend Mr. Powerthighs being retconned into Bun-Lad, and turned to Naughtiness and accidently sorta kinda blew up Pittsburgh 'n stuff? Those were the days. Um, sorry if I singed your eyebrows when I attacked you with the Mystic Tiki Torch, but, you know, you had gotten drunk with power and turned to the Dark Side.

[taraljc.livejournal.com]

Remember that one time we took the heads off all the Barbies we got for $2 each at Walmart, and made the voodoo necklace with the Skippers? I mostly remember it cos we made that ltitle girl in the restaurant at MWC cry, co we thought we'd got them from her toybox at home, and she totally flipepd out, while Buffy the waitress wanted her picture taken with you cos you had the one with the red hair that had been cut in the Mowhawk.

Good times.

[claudiall.livejournal.com]

I remember the two of us sharing a picnic by the pool (cos there ain't no lake where you and me live, baby!); we had blueberry pie, your favourite.

[saffronhouse.livejournal.com]

It was the waning, heady days of Prague Spring when we spraypainted witty slogans on the side of Soviet tanks by moonlight. I would do it all again, even the part where you spent the next twenty years in the gulag and I was exiled to East Berlin and squandered the tatters of my lost youth compounding testosterone unguents for the East German Women's swim team. Those were the days, my friend.

[cocoajava.livejournal.com]

*sigh*

I wish I could conjure up a memory of you, I really do. But the mandatory mindwipe that was part of the witness relocation situation took them all away. So all I have left of you is a scrawled signature that looks something like "Arm Lemur" inside the back cover of my copy of Ayn Rand's "Anthem". So it must have been a present from you.

[snacky]

Gosh, remember the time we flew to Paris for a weekend on a whim? And we went up to the top of the Eiffel Tower and I dared you to drop skittles down on the people passing by, and you got arrested and our weekend in Paris turned into two months as we tried to get you out of jail.

Man, those were some great baguettes.

[bodhibird.livejournal.com]

I remember that time we were at Connexions together and crashed the BDSM in Slash panel. The moderators were really annoyed that you and I sat in the back and hooted at them, especially the one in the purple corset. Later that weekend, we impersonated the two mods in an impromptu skit; you did Purple Corset Woman, I did Redhead with the Huge Rack, and we were a big hit. On returning home, we both found a whole buncha people had defriended us, but it was so worth it.

[violetisblue.livejournal.com]

It's not that I minded your turning me and my entire family into vampires, it's just that you said the Hello Kitty Cow's Blood Starter Kit would be shipped in four to six weeks and it never arrived. And then that time you filled my entire bedroom from floor to ceiling with marshmallows. What gives?

[cimness.livejournal.com]

if you still remember how i accidentally destroyed your brief but dizzying rise to fame as a children's author, i apologise profusely. i totally didn't know that was your pseudonym. also, i had nothing to do with the parodies. i don't even own photoshop.

[tacohime.livejournal.com]

I spilled a two-liter of Coke on you and then you punched me in the jaw and also broke my glasses. I've been feeling very hurt ever since that time.

[marlo.livejournal.com]

I'll never forget that time we made the Lord of the Rings trilogy, but then decided to credit it to Peter Jackson, because we didn't want to have to deal with the fame. And then we made that death pact, where if one of us ever spills the secret, the other has to kill them.

Oh shi-

[pandoras-closet.livejournal.com]

I'll always remember that time we stumbled across that Time Machine and wound up causing the Fires that burned down Rome. Chicago and Seattle.

I still say we should have mugged Nero for his violin.

[hawkmoth.livejournal.com]

How about that time we got drunk at a convention and short-sheeted Susan's bed? And propped a bucket of water over Mary GT's door?

[amilyn.livejournal.com]

Girlfriend, I will NEVER forget the time at MWC when we laid in wait for dogwalkers outside the side doors to the parking lot and then tossed out handfuls of treats to watch the dogs LUNGE forward with their owners. It was really sweet the way you used comic drawings you made on the spot of the spectacular falls as a kind of apology. And then, later, that night, with the whipped cream and chocolate syrup... I just wish that the nuts hadn't caused that anaphylactic reaction, cuz that kind of ruined the moment. But the sculpture, for those few moments, was truly awesome. Woo, yeah!

[motheaten.livejournal.com]

remember that time in hamburg when we both took ecstasy and then we walked passed a couple of prostitutes and you said, "i bet if we were trying to sell any other body part except for the mouth and cooter, no one would be interested," and i said, "nuh uh," and you said, "yuh huh," and i said, "i bet you twenty deutschmarks and a currywurst that i can hustle my foot on the streets of hamburg" and you said, "you're on."
so i put a little lace garter around my ankle and stuck my naked foot out within ten minutes (and some stilted, broken conversation in bad english and even worse german) i sold my foot. two hundred deutschmarks for a half hour. the buyer was an elderly swedish businessman named "anders". he resembled a slightly less grizzly and more scandinavian "smee" from the movie "hook". as we headed to his hotel that faces the river alster, you disappeared. i had to sit in the dry shower stall with my foot stuck out of the shower curtain partition while my rented foot was subjected to all sorts of things i shall not repeat for the next half hour. when it was all over, a flushed yet pleased "anders" stuffed the two hundred deutschmarks into my hand and i escaped.
then, i could not find you. you were not at our usual beergarden. you were not at the comic book store. you were not at the hostel. i heard a rumour of your legendary merrymaking in budapest but that was the last i had heard of you.until now.
YOU OWE ME TWENTY DEUTSCHMARKS AND A CURRYWURST, YOU HUSSY!!!

[ex-londonso.livejournal.com]

remember when i touched you.

[kellyratherodd.livejournal.com]

I remember the time you bought me twenty shots of Jaegermeister and I woke up bald the next morning in the neighbor's garden with an IOU for a Target wig. Scribbled on the back of the note was an explanation saying that you needed the money to pay off bingo debts and how to make homemade Rogaine. Man, I didn't even like Jaegermeister then, I certainly don't like it now.

[dwinghy.livejournal.com]

Remember that time? With the thing? And the guy? And the dead heroin dealer on your doorstep so you couldn't close the screen door?

[lots42.livejournal.com]

I still don't know what happened to my pants, but I think they are under your fridge.

[la-cienega.livejournal.com]

i don't care what anybody still says, including YOU elton john, our float of dancing oompa loompa's at the gay pride parade was the BOMB.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_yaddayadda/]

Remember that time we went to get coffee in Akron? But on the walk over some guy knocked you over and stole your purse? And we both stood there in surprised terror until I finally started yelling "911! 911!"? And then we met that nice police officer Matt? And we finally got to the coffee shop four hours later? And everyone kept saying "This never happens in Akron!"

You still owe me for that cappicino.

[mordecai.livejournal.com]

My liver is still really mad at you for giving me Hep C, especially when I hadn't been vaccinated for A or B.

[nitasee.livejournal.com]

Remember that time when we went about dressed as the girls from Sailor Moon? We went through the hotel hallways bobbing people on the head with our moon hands crying "The power of the moon compels you..." We kept changing what the power of the moon compelled them to do.

And then, there was that time when I snuck into your bedroom and covered everything, floor, ceiling everything, with aluminum foil. Eh, you could never be too careful about those alien mind rays.

[psychoticspy.livejournal.com]

Oh! Remember when we won Wimbledon as fake conjoined twins? I still have the skirt in my wardorobe.

Did you ever go on that date with John McEnroe?

[maajaml.livejournal.com]

Remember when we were on top of an iceberg in the middle of the Atlantic ocean and a ship called.. Tiranic or whatever crashed into us?