phosfate: Ouroboros painting closeup (Default)
[personal profile] phosfate
Dear Amazon:

Please stop recommending me gay gothic novels, books about cat-owning Lesbian detectives, and anything with "For Dummies" in the title. Thank you.

Your pal,

Ann

(no subject)

Date: 2002-11-12 08:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cocoajava.livejournal.com
Dear Ann:

Thank you for contacting the Amazon Recommendation Services. We know you will be excited by this months dual offering, "The Vampire Feline Spy Chronicles" and "Gayness For Dummies". And to further titillate your bibliophile tendencies, buy a mere 59 copies of these quality books and shipping will sorta almost kinda be FREE!

Love, Amazon.

(no subject)

Date: 2002-11-12 08:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pollyannadesade.livejournal.com
You mean you don't like "The Mystery at Radclyffe Hall School for Girls" by Sappho Winterson Le Fanu de Pussy!? Grr, you are so hard to please...

(no subject)

Date: 2002-11-12 08:40 am (UTC)
ext_6373: A swan and a ballerina from an old children's book about ballet, captioned SWAN! (Default)
From: [identity profile] annlarimer.livejournal.com
Actually I'd probably read that one...

(no subject)

Date: 2002-11-12 08:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ex-mommybir.livejournal.com
I can't figure out why purchasing Batman DVDs should mean I'm interested in the complete second season of Buffy. Well, maybe as a gift for my daughter, but not otherwise.

Amazon Logic

Date: 2002-11-12 09:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] paradisacorbasi.livejournal.com
Batman...has -->bats.

Bats that go flap.

Bats that go flap do not mean -->baseball, so they can't recommend "A League of Their Own or The Dream Team"

Bats that go flap ...are often vampire bats! Aha! Vampires!

If this person likes Batman, s/he likes bats, and if s/he likes bats, s/he likes vampire bats, and if s/he likes vampire bats, s/he likes vampires, and Buffy is a vampire slayer!

Or, more simply:

They're both action-fantasy and both have comic books about them.

Re: Amazon Logic

Date: 2002-11-12 09:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ex-mommybir.livejournal.com
I still don't get it.

I understand that I might confuse them by looking at conservative Catholic books one week and Celtic Wiccan books the next. But Batman does not equal Buffy, no matter how much they try.

Re: Amazon Logic

Date: 2002-11-12 10:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theodicy.livejournal.com
Easy. They're logging everything you buy/search and everything that others with similar interests search/buy. Ergo, someone whose interests and prior searches resemble yours bought Batman and Buffy.

Sorry.

Re: Amazon Logic

Date: 2002-11-12 10:38 am (UTC)
ext_6373: A swan and a ballerina from an old children's book about ballet, captioned SWAN! (Default)
From: [identity profile] annlarimer.livejournal.com
Exactly. It's why if you buy a Harry Potter novel from them, you are offered the latest Tom Clancey and A Girl Named Zippy.

(no subject)

Date: 2002-11-12 01:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] smuu.livejournal.com
"Cat owning lesbian detectives"? O_o Goodness! Now there's a niche market that's begging to be filled.

(no subject)

Date: 2002-11-12 01:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tengukun.livejournal.com
Heheheh choice of words... XD

(no subject)

Date: 2002-11-12 02:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] smuu.livejournal.com
Holy Freudian Slip, Batman!

(no subject)

Date: 2002-11-12 04:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] suzyd.livejournal.com
I would be offended on your behalf if I didn't believe that you had extensively purchased books from those exact genres. ;)

(no subject)

Date: 2002-11-12 06:47 pm (UTC)
ext_6373: A swan and a ballerina from an old children's book about ballet, captioned SWAN! (Default)
From: [identity profile] annlarimer.livejournal.com
No way, dude! Cat-free dykes RULE!

Re:

Date: 2002-11-13 03:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] suzyd.livejournal.com
"Two dykes with extra bondage gear, hold the cat". :P

(no subject)

Date: 2002-11-12 05:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] strawberrythief.livejournal.com
I'm with you on the "For Dummies" thing. I take that shit personally.

(no subject)

Date: 2002-11-12 06:46 pm (UTC)
ext_6373: A swan and a ballerina from an old children's book about ballet, captioned SWAN! (Default)
From: [identity profile] annlarimer.livejournal.com
Damn straight!

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