phosfate

Years ago, cocoajava and I began the tradition of Paperweight Duty. It's in celebration of the poor sap who has to answer the phones in the office while everyone else is off burning mandatory vacation time. Most years, that sap is us, and we strive mightily to keep each other entertained.

Thanks to the President giving us the 24th off, this year, PAPERWEIGHT DUTY DAY will be celebrated on December 21. But you can do it on the 24th if they make you come in then. Want your own official Paperweight Duty banner? You can haz!

Gallery here: http://pics.livejournal.com/annlarimer/gallery/0002ss7h Pick dated or undated, cussin' or no cussin', or make your own (we'd love to see it).

"I can kill you with my brain, or I can kill you with this dreidel. It's your choice."

Perpetua Nazca, Littlefair Sleeping Angelica doll. That's her default dress and a hat made from baby mitties out of Target's dollar bin. Fearsome expression thanks to Mr Accidental Flash.

HAPPY BOXING DAY!

*punches you*

1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate?

Hot chocolate. Also coffee.

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree?

Wrapping. Not necessarily with paper.

3. Colored lights on tree/house or white?

I'm not entirely sure how to hang lights on the house. Also, I have this problem with fire. White on the tree, but not this year.

4. Do you hang mistletoe?

We had plastic mistletoe at the old house.

6. What is your favorite holiday dish?

That fudge Kathy used to make/buy (I'm a little fuzzy), and her excellent sugar cookies from that bakery in Omaha.

7. Favorite holiday memory as a child?

Finding my unwrapped present stash in my big sister's closet, and sneaking in there every couple days to wallow in it. Then pretending I didn't know what any of it was on Christmas morning. Talking P.J., I still miss you.

Also, when I opened that Chitty Chitty Bang Bang movie storybook and screamed.

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa?

I don't remember. Probably gradually. Also, his handwriting was eerily like my sister's.

This doesn't mean, however, that he does not deserve thanks and cookies.

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve?

When I was little we were all allowed one present, to stop our heads exploding in the night. 1960s heavily materialistic kids Christmases? Fucking awesome.

10. How do you decorate your Christmas Tree?

This year I made a Victorian mourning tree, from a black Halloween tree, a handmade beaded garland, and a couple of bags of black Christmas balls. It's been joined by a white desktop tree from Borders, with more black balls, white handmade beaded garland, some Halloween ornaments, and various black and white toys. Also, the dreidels. It's not Christmas without the dreidels.

11. Snow! Love it or Dread it?

Both. It's awesome, apart from the shoveling. But shoveling is awesome if you have a small child or dog around.

12. Can you ice skate?

I haven't the faintest idea.

13. Do you remember your favorite gift?

See #7. Talking P.J., storybook. Also watching my parents try to assemble Barbie's Dream House was pretty damn funny. Eventually they just let me do it.

14. What's the most important thing about the Holidays for you?

Having people over. And really good TV marathons.

15. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert?

See #6.

16. What is your favorite holiday tradition?

We keep changing them. I liked when Mom got me a Star Trek ornament every year. Or when I was little and we all sang on the way to the tree.

17. What tops your tree?

Nothing at the moment. I tried a doll head, but it was too freaky big. Still working on it.

18. Which do you prefer giving or receiving?

Both.

19. What is your favorite Christmas Song?

Christmas music, on the whole, makes me want to kill myself. I like to put on some Fred Astaire or something.

20. Candy Canes! Yuck or Yum?

Eh.

Mom uncertain about the whole DVD player thing until I pointed out she can now watch any movie she wants instead of trying to track down the city's only VHS copy, failing, and watching its debut on TBS 18 months later.

Unfortunately, this meant having to go out and fetch (and watch) March of the Penguins. Now very depressed by frozen penguin eggs, frozen baby penguins, frozen old tired penguins, layers and layers and layers of frozen penguin shit at the penguin breeding grounds, and general filthiness of penguins out of water for three months. Reminded of time Samoyed dog ate two pounds of wild Morells. Sting taken off a bit when it turned out that Bugs Bunny in "8-Ball Bunny" ("HoBOken?!? OOOOOOOO I'm DYYYYYin' again!") was included as an extra.

Also it plays CDs, another first for her, and is a much nicer VCR than any we've ever had.

Live in fear of Mom now remembering existence of Phantom of the Opera, Richard Gere movies. But can retaliate with Suicide Club, various Ringu volumes.

1. When do you put your Christmas decorations up? I'll let you know.

2. Do you prefer to use Christmas lights that are all one color, or do you go for the multicolor effect? Whities. We save the color for the ornaments.

3. Real tree or fake? Fake.

4. Where do you get your tree? From the basement.

5. Perfectly shaped tree, or one with character? Do you really need to ask me that question?

6. Where do you put your tree? Living room. NE corner.

7. Tinsel or garland? Red glass balls.

8. Blinking lights or solid lights on the tree? Solid white.

9. What sits on the very top of your tree? We lost the old topper, so I made one a couple of years ago - gold star with a celestial device on it, and ribbons.

10. Eggnog or hot chocolate? Cappucino.

11. What does your family Christmas feast consist of? Several very large pizzas, Cathy's spinach salad, coffee, soda, that Chex stuff and assorted dainties. Mom makes five or six pounds of Little Smokies in barbecue sauce for David, but I pretend they don't exist because they're disgusting. It's better than it sounds.

12. What day do you typically hold your Christmas celebrations? Everybody comes over Christmas Eve.

13. When do you open your presents? Whenever they let me.

14. Do you open them all at once, or one by one? One by one.

15. Favorite Christmas movie? A Christmas Carol with Alastair Sim, A Christmas Story.

17. Do you have any family holiday traditions that you partake in each year? We're big on the traditional songs, such as "Lion Sleeps Tonight" and "Stop In the Name of Love." I also like to shout "You've RUINED Christmas! RUINED IT!!!" at random intervals.

18. For New Year's Eve, do you go out, or stay in? Who can say? Is there a Millennium marathon this year?